Sarcastic Facebook Statuses That Will Get Likes

Quotes have an amazing capacity to stir others and change the manner in which we feel about ourselves. These sarcastic facebook statuses that will get likes for your status. When you change the nature of your reasoning, you change the nature of your life, some of the time in a split second.

Similarly, as positive words can make somebody grin or an all-around planned hilarious statement can make somebody chuckle, our contemplations respond to the world progressively.

Sarcastic Facebook Statuses That Will Get Likes

Here is a rundown of a portion of the best motivational statements for you can begin another life by taking control of your contemplations, thinking emphatically and defining new objectives. In the event that you look carefully, you’ll see the vitality of motivation is all near.

• People are always like “so are you a morning person or a night person” and I’m like buddy I’m barely even a person.
• Funny how in high school we all had like 500 classes a day but in college, we have like 3 and still skip 2.
• “You look happier” is one of the best compliments you can receive in life.
• Deep Facebook Statuses That Will Get a lot of Likes
• I need people in my life who are way more understanding of my tendency to not talk to them for months at a time.
• I will ignore the humans. until. they go into. the. bathroom. then. I will decide. that I need. pets. immediately.
• I like my bed more than I like most people.
• If we date, my entire family will help you make fun of me.
• One of the best feelings in the world is when you ‘re hugging a person you love and they hug you back even tighter.
• Need a calm $10,000 dropped into my bank acct rn.
• Going out for food is legit my favorite thing to do.
• My best talent is watching 5 years worth of a tv show on Netflix in a week.
• Date a girl who’s cute af but can also eat a whole pizza by herself.
• Honestly, if we never speak again that’s yo fault.
• Dear future employers scrolling through my facebook, I know there is some questionable stuff here but you have to admit it’s kinda funny.
• The people at grocery stores who let you go in front of them because you only have 3 items & they have a cartful are my favorite kinds of people.
• Snapchats from unexpected people makes me nervous because I wonder what on earth have they decided to send me.
• Girls who think acting dumb is cute ??? noooo sis what is you doinnnn.
• Quotes About Being Unique And Different
• When u wanna post something but it’s that direct u might aswell put it in an envelope & post it to their house so u have to stop urself.
• My future child better is funny because i am not spending 18 years fake laughing in my own house.
• Good memories with a toxic person doesn’t cancel out what they did.
• When you close lay down for a couple of minutes and open your eyes and it’s been 2 hours.
• Do you ever want to punch yourself in the face for liking someone a lot.
• It’s funny how I am good at giving advices to others but when it comes to helping myself, I don’t know what to do!!
• Never trust a person with one only facebook picture.
• Accidentally missed the freeway exit for home, now I’m heading north to start a new life.
• Maybe the chicken saw someone from high school.
• Teenage girls hang out in odd numbered groups because they literally can’t even.

• Nothing is more dangerous than a woman “gathering her thoughts”
• About to mail my check for $1500 to nigeria for the $15million lottery i just won! Cya later SUCKAS!!
• Crying for no particular reason other than the fact that my cat spontaneously combusted!
• Inspirational Facebook Statuses That Will Get Likes
• I know it’s “cool” to make fun of celebrities, but the Bieber jokes need to stop. That’s somebody’s daughter.
• “It’s complicated” relationship status = someone cheated but we signed a lease
• Made my car into a hybrid by siphoning gas out of your tank.
• Listening to the latest britney spears record. i mean. definately not listening to britney spears.
• The statement ‘Hey! Calm down!’ has a zero to no success rate of getting someone to calm down.
• I will never miss you, because I’m a really good shooter.
• I’ve found that I can usually judge how hot a woman is by how many times my girlfriend calls her a whore.
• All the cutest and scariest animals are in Australia. How do you Australians get anything done? So much petting and fending off.
• Dear IRS…I would like an itemized receipt showing me exactly how every one of my tax dollars is being spent. Thanks
• If you are going to speak bad things about me on my back, come to me. I’ll tell you more .
• I know it’s “cool” to make fun of celebrities, but the Bieber jokes need to stop. That’s somebody’s daughter
• When I was a kid, I used to wake up early just to watch cartoons.
• That awkward moment when all the seats are taken and everybody is staring at you.
• If only the world would look as hard for a clean alternative to oil and coal as it is for that damn plane we might be alive when they find it
• Facebook is like a nude beach. Everybody lets everything hang out, and you really don’t want to see a lot of it.
• I’m gonna name my son Russell so people think he has a speech impediment.
• I’ve heard a few women mention that they love to get gifts from men that take their breath away…I’m thinking treadmill.
• I don’t want to be a millionaire, I just want enough money to be able to stare off into the distance while pumping gas.
• I want to ki¦¦ you. (options may vary)
• I still water my dead plants every 3 months. Just in case.
• Quotes About Ignoring Someone You Like
• I was NOT taking a selfie. I was showing off my new bathroom mirror!
• Learn a lesson from your dog. No matter what life brings you, kick some grass over that crap and move on.
• I wish I had somebody to blame all of my problems on like my wife does.
• What’s money? A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do.
• When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.

• The mind is everything. What you think you become!
• The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.
• An unexamined life is not worth living.
• Eighty percent of success is showing up.
• Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.
• Winning isn’t everything, but wanting to win is.
• I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions.
• Every child is an artist.  The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up.
• If you think things can’t get worse, it’s probably only because you lack sufficient imagination.
• From good things, I learn to be a thankful person. From bad things, I learn to be a strong person.
• Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
• Quotes About Being Ignored By Your Boyfriend
• Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.
• Books have the knowledge, knowledge is power, power corrupts, corruption is a crime, and crime doesn’t pay. So if you keep reading, you’ll go broke.
• You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.
• It may look like I’m doing nothing, but I’m actively waiting for my problems to go away. Every rule has an exception, especially this one.
• To err is human. To arr is a pirate.
• I wouldn’t say you’re stupid. You are, but I wouldn’t say it.
• Surround yourself with those who see greatness in you, even when you don’t see it for yourself.
• One small crack does not mean that you are broken; it means that you were put on the test and you didn’t fall apart…
• People will laugh at your dreams, then hate you when you make them come true. !!
• The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love and to let it come in.
•  “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”
•  “Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart, and the senses.”
•  “You know it’s love when all you want is that person to be happy, even if you’re not part of their happiness.”
•  “Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.”
•  The best love is the kind that awakens the soul; that makes us reach for more, that plants the fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. That’s what I hope to give you forever.
• Love cures people—both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it.
• Hurting Quotes For Whatsapp Status
• There are two types of people who will tell you that you cannot make a difference in this world: those who are afraid to try and those who are afraid you will succeed
• “If you genuinely want something, don’t wait for it–teach yourself to be impatient.”
• Successful and unsuccessful people do not vary greatly in their abilities. They vary in their desires to reach their potential He who loses money loses much; He, who loses a friend, loses much more; He, who loses faith, loses all.
• Don’t let money run your life, let money help you run your life better.